Honesty is the best policy...right? Check out this question from a BFFer that has encountered an exception to this rule:
Q: My best friend is always honest. How is this a problem, you may ask? Well, she's too truthful. She constantly says exactly what is on her mind, even if her opinion is borderline hurtful. It's great that I can always turn to her when I have a question about an outfit, haircut, etc., but sometimes the blunt truth is just too much to handle! How can I tell her to keep being honest...without being so honest?
A: Before we dive into this situation, we want to stress one point to you: an honest friend is always better than a dishonest friend. The fact that she is so truthful with you reflects her comfort and trust of you. On the other hand, you have the right to talk about your feelings with her. Let her know that you value her honesty, but ask if she can "cushion" her criticisms. Try to think of specific examples of when her truthfulness has hurt your feelings because there is a very good chance that she does not even realize that her words can sting. Be straightforward when you address the issue: "Remember that time that you said that my haircut was horrible? That really hurt my feelings and I'm having some trouble moving past it...". A true friend will listen to what you have to say and make an effort to change...or at least filter her opinions!
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Friday, October 15, 2010
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